TGISports

Cardinals Halfway Point

2009-11-25T21:51:00.000-08:00

I was just looking over my previous post, in which I picked every game for the Arizona Cardinals in the 2009 Season, and I just wanted to pat myself on the back (for the most part).

Week 1 - 49ers. Win 24-20. A season opener that will be a close game, I'm really hoping for a win here. Wrong, but I got it close! Final score was 20-16

Week 2 - @Jaguars. Win 28-17. A bold prediction, but I think we'll see a nice win in J-Ville. Got this almost spot on, final score was 31-17

Week 3 - Colts. Loss 23-22. I have a feeling something weird will happen in this game (it's on national TV and it's the Cardinals, so, you know) which will cause that weird score. Got the outcome right, but the Colts really laid a whoopin' on the Cards 31-10.

Week 4 - Bye. Win 28-0. A strong showing by the Birds will make this a blowout. The Cards dominated just like I said

Week 5 - Texans. Win 35-31. Antonio Smith will run his mouth and lose in a shootout. While it wasn't really a shootout (it was a tale of two halves) the score was pretty close, 28-21

Week 6 - @Seahawks. Loss 24-23. A shitty game ends with Seattle driving down the field for a win. Stupid Seahawks. This starts the string of games I got wrong, 27-3 very impressive win by the Cards

Week 7 - @Giants. Loss 35-17. I've seen too many Cardinals games to know a blowout when I see it. A bigger shock than the final score will be the Cards keeping it close. Another one I predicted incorrectly, Cards had a giant win in NY :)

Week 8 - Panthers. Win 33-13. Same as last time, Jake "Of the home" Delhomme takes a beating. The score was almost the opposite, 34-20 and the Panthers certainly got their revenge

Week 9 - @Bears. Loss 10000-0. It would be nice to get paypack for the famous "Let 'em off the hook" game, but the Cardinals won't do it. ANOTHER one I got wrong, I get back on track next week, don't worry guys!

Week 10 - Seahawks. Win 33 - 23. Big win here, helps the Cardinals inch closer to a division title. Cards get a 31-20 come back win against the 'Hawks, and boy did they need a home win.

Week 11 - @Rams. Win 24-18. The Rams kick a boatload of field goals, but Warner (or Leinart) lead the Birds to a win. It certainly was a close win, and I even mentioned Leinart possibly playing and he FREAKIN' did!

Through 10 Games:

Predicted : 6-4

Actual : 7-3

While the Cards are ahead of where I predicted them to be, I would still be surprised if they made it to 11-5 as I predicted. I think 10-6 is much more realistic, but they could certainly win 11 or 12 games.

Arizona Cardinals 2009 Predictions

2009-09-13T00:53:00.001-07:00

This is more for myself to remember (and to have a record of this that I can lookup anytime). Below are my predictions for the Arizona Cardinals 2009 Season (Hint: Scores included!). These are off the cuff so if any are wrong, that's why.

Week 1 - 49ers. Win 24-20. A season opener that will be a close game, I'm really hoping for a win here.

Week 2 - @Jaguars. Win 28-17. A bold prediction, but I think we'll see a nice win in J-Ville.

Week 3 - Colts. Loss 23-22. I have a feeling something weird will happen in this game (it's on national TV and it's the Cardinals, so, you know) which will cause that weird score.

Week 4 - Bye. Win 28-0. A strong showing by the Birds will make this a blowout.

Week 5 - Texans. Win 35-31. Antonio Smith will run his mouth and lose in a shootout.

Week 6 - @Seahawks. Loss 24-23. A shitty game ends with Seattle driving down the field for a win. Stupid Seahawks.

Week 7 - @Giants. Loss 35-17. I've seen too many Cardinals games to know a blowout when I see it. A bigger shock than the final score will be the Cards keeping it close.

Week 8 - Panthers. Win 33-13. Same as last time, Jake "Of the home" Delhomme takes a beating.

Week 9 - @Bears. Loss 10000-0. It would be nice to get paypack for the famous "Let 'em off the hook" game, but the Cardinals won't do it.

Week 10 - Seahawks. Win 33 - 23. Big win here, helps the Cardinals inch closer to a division title.

Week 11 - @Rams. Win 24-18. The Rams kick a boatload of field goals, but Warner (or Leinart) lead the Birds to a win.

Week 12- @Titans. Loss 21-17. Close score but the Titans could have easily won by 10 or more (mark my words).

Week 13 - Vikings. Win 28-27. A game the Cardinals could easily lose, but they pull out the win (somehow) and avenge last year's ass whopping.

Week 14 - @49ers. Win 28-20. Great win here, division is done. Cards win it, wooo! Wooo!

Week 15 - @Lions. Win 35-31. The Lions keep it close because the Birds are lackadaisical from last week's gigantic win. ONE CAVEAT: If the Lions are 0-13 at this point, the Cardinals will DEFINITELY lose. They are terrible when losing streaks are on the line.

Week 16 - Rams. Win 24-10. Either happy they got of Detroit with a win, or pissed as hell they lost to an 0-13 (and 0-29) team, the Cardinals come out and crunch the rams.

Week 17- Packers. Win 28-24. I'm picking a win here, but it could go a lot of different ways. If both teams have something to play for, the Cards barely win. If only one team has something to play for, that team wins.

BOOM! I just made the NFL season a lot easier for everyone to watch. Now there's no drama, you can relax! You're welcome!

The bench played better

2009-04-05T22:20:00.001-07:00

So the Phoenix Suns lost to the Dallas Mavericks 140-116 on Sunday, a game in which officially closed the door on any playoffs hopes for the Suns this year. This was also a game in which the Suns gave up 80 first half points, which begs the question: how the hell do you give up 80 points in the first half on your "World Cup" game? (Grant Hill's words) Also, how do you make 58 year old Jason Kidd look like Magic Johnson in his pride? This bald SOB pictured above had 16 assists in the first half. He was making passes from all over the court, and topped it off with his last one to Josh Howard who hit a 70 footer right before the half. It was ridiculous, the Suns had no interest in playing any defense (and boy did Mark Jackson let us know about it on ABC) and gave up halfway through the 2nd quarter.

This brings me to my next point; the Suns bench played much better than the starters on Sunday. In fact, they have been for the past week. Every time Dudley, Amundson, Dragic, Swift and Tucker (and now Barbosa) go out there, they outscore the other team and hustle their asses off. The most exciting part of the game on Sunday was the beginning of the second quarter, in which the Suns bench outplayed the Mavericks bench and closed the lead to 3 points.

Maybe it's for the best that the Suns lost in this way, because now they know for sure that they are not good enough to be in the playoffs and shouldn't harbor any leftover feelings for this season. I'm ready to move on to what will be one of the most interesting Suns offseasons in recent memory and I hope the front office is as well.

TGISports early weekend highlights

2009-04-04T23:13:00.000-07:00

It's UNC v Mich St. - If you claim to have Michigan St. winning it all in your bracket, your lying and everyone knows it. Not even people from Michigan picked 'em, they all picked Michigan or even wrote in "Detroit University" before picking the Spartans.

Wrestlemania XXV - It's tonight! I don't know about about you but I'm watching my backside. Cause, you know, if you hear that glass, it's your ass.

It's the Laker-Beatdown-Bowl! - The Suns and Maverics face off Sunday afternoon, a game that will go a long way in determining who gets beat like a 4 year old in KMart by the Lakers in the playoffs. Please, oh please can the Suns be given that honor!

Baseball's back, baby! - Is it that wonderful time of year again already? I'll give you a quick rundown of what the next 6 months are gonna look like on Sportscenter:

YankeesYankeesYankeesRedSoxYankeesMetsYankeesRedsoxPhillies(if they're lucky)YankeesMannyBein'MannyYankeesRedsoxSteroidsAll-StarYankeesYankeesYankees(Yankees eliminated from playoff contention)YankeesMets(Mets drop out of playoff contention)PlayoffsYankeesOffseason

I can't wait!!

More April Fool's wackiness!

2009-04-03T07:53:00.000-07:00

Believe it or not, there were even more April Fool's pranks involving sports that I neglected to mention yesterday. These people are just so clever, they should get some kind of award. And by "award" I mean "beaten on camera":

Orlando Magic - pulled the 'ole switcharoo on the crowd, first making them think they pranked a fan at center court, then having the joke turned on them. Bottom line: this joke is way to damn complicated for me to follow. Read the link if you'd like a nice nap this morning.

Hasheem Thabeet - The UCONN center put on his clown nose and concocted an amazing prank on twitter (aka Prank Central Station). A failed drug test, OMG LOL ROFL!!! By the way, when did Thabeet turn into a 12 year old girl? A few less exclamations and capital leters please, kthxbai.

KTAR - Go screw, KTAR. You are a legitimate news outlet and decide to prank the State of Arizona. Whoever runs that company should be fired and not allowed to work in radio ever again.

University of Arizona - The big joke this week was that Tim Floyd supposedly turned down the job at Arizona and....oh wait that wasn't a joke? Oh, my apologies, I guess it was just a terribly embarrasing situation for the school and basketball program. Sorry about that.

Bears get Cutler, give up a boatload

2009-04-02T14:30:00.000-07:00

Gigantic news coming out of Chicago today, as the Chicago Bears have acquired Pro Bowl quarterback Jay Cutler. According to ProFootballTalk, the Bears are giving up:

Two 1st round picks
One 3rd round pick
Quarterback Kyle Orton

Not too bad for a guy who is 17-20 in his career. I'm not saying he's not worth it, but damn is that a lot. The Bears finally, finally have a franchise quarterback and may finally be able to put up some points. I love the fact that they shipped Mr. Beard himself Kyle Orton to Denver, if only they could have found a way to ship off Sexy Rexy Grossman as well.

The team that seems to have missed out the most is the Washington Redskins, who were heavily involved (allegedly) in trade talks with Cutler. Hopefully Jason Campbell isn't too emotionally damaged to continue playing average football for them.

(by the way apparently Jay Cutler is also the name of a famous bodybuilder, an a handsome one at that)

April Fools FTL, Around The Horn FTW

2009-04-02T07:51:00.000-07:00

Seeing as I am starchily against April Fool's jokes, I was pretty much upset all day yesterday, as every media outlet in America tried their best to pull one over on you. Only Around the Horn (video above) came through with a decent "prank" when Woody Paige hosted the show instead of Tony Reali (who appeared as a panelist).

As a service to my millions of readers, I thought I'd run down a few of the worst perpetrators (some sports related, some not):

PTI - Their lead story was that Calipari passed on the Kentucky job and Rick Pitino had stepped in. Had me for about 3 seconds, then I was blinded with rage

Gambo and Ash - Claimed that Lute Olsen has decided to come back to the University of Arizona to coach again (this actually would have been better than what may REALLY happen)

Heidi Montag - Claimed she was pregnant on twitter, only ended up fooling herself. BOOM, roasted. (BTW if you follow her on twitter, you should be thrown in a burlap sack and beaten)

CBS - Promoted a new show called "I Get That A Lot" where celebrities posed as normal people and when people recognized them they say "I get that a lot". Wait, this wasn't a joke? It's an actual show?

Another maddening Suns win

2009-04-02T07:25:00.000-07:00

The Suns had a great showing last night, beating the Houston Rockets 124-119. Steve Nash had a great game, netting 25 points and 17 assists in the win. And is it just me or is the most exciting part of the game when the 2nd unit comes in. The team of Amundson, Tucker, Dudley, Swift and Goran Dragic (pictured above looking like he's 16 years old) may not be the most gifted bunch, but damn do they play hard.

Unfortunately for the Suns they are still 4 games out of the playoffs because the Mavericks beat the Miami Heat by two freakin' points in Dallas on Wednesday (serenity now!). This leaves only 7 games to make up a 4 game defecit, although Alvin Gentry doesn't seem to awful worried.

Just about everything that can go wrong for the Suns has this year; every time they get a big win, so do the teams in front of them, and every time the teams in front of them lose, the Suns have an embarrassing defeat. Every time the Suns win a couple games in a row, they lose a star player. It just isn't their year. It's like when you take the early flight home from San Diego and you find two naked blindfolded people ready to hop out of your bathroom like a damn magic show, it's just not good.

Cutler no likey Denver

2009-03-31T21:53:00.000-07:00

Yikes, big news coming out of Denver late on Tuesday. Apparently Broncos GM Pat Bowlen is fed up with quarterback Jay Cutler's crap and is ready to make a move. From my ProFootballTalk, aka Louisville (my #1 seed):

“Numerous attempts to contact Jay Cutler in the last 10 days, both by [coach] Josh McDaniels and myself, have been unsuccessful.

“A conversation with his agent earlier today clearly communicated and confirmed to us that Jay no longer has any desire to play for the Denver Broncos.

“We will begin discussions with other teams in an effort to accommodate his request to be traded.”

Wow, and even more developments have occured since that statement went out (which was just a couple hours ago). The Broncos team store is no longer stocking Cutler jerseys, and Cutler has even been removed from the team's online roster. There is already a working list of teams that are interested in Cutler as well. ProFootballTalk (who must be pitching a giant tent in their pants right now) has at least 8 teams interested in them:

The Jets, Buccaneers, Bears, Lions, 49ers, and Browns already have been identified. Per Robinson and Cole, the Jaguars have shown interest as well.
Meanwhile, chatter persists in league circles regarding the Redskins. We heard several weeks ago that the ‘Skins are indeed interested.

There are few things I love more than a huge NFL trade (one involves, brownies, ice cream and a Friends marathon) and this will be about as big as they get. I'd personally like to see the Redskins get him, seeing as they could beat up on the Cowboys, Giants and Eagles a couple times a year (teams I'm not a big fan of), and stay out of our divison 3 out every 4 years. As long as the 49ers don't get him I'm sure everyone in Arizona will be very pleased.

Season.Over.

2009-03-31T10:00:00.000-07:00

So the Suns not only lost to the Sacramento Kings on Sunday, they lost any shot they had of making the playoffs this year. Somehow, the Suns gave up 126 points to the worst team in the NBA (and who will soon be Blake Griffin's new home). It was a fitting end to a season filled with disappointment. It wouldn't have been enough for them to lose to a good team, it had to be a pathetic team with pretty much nothing to play for. Yah, they have Kevin Martin, but c'mon, he's 5'9" and weights 135lbs. soaking wet. You can find a dude off the street to cover him for 40 minutes a game (I know what your thinking, and no, your's truly is not available).

And it keeps getting worse in the box score. Somehow, Spencer Hawes (AKA the Whitest Man in the World) somehow had 20 points and 10 rebounds. Why Shaq did not maul this guy like a bear after he grabbed his first rebound is beyond me.

P.S. I know I'm like a week late on this story, so please don't flood my inbox with letters (yah, it happens alot)

So that sucked

2009-03-28T23:27:00.000-07:00

Wow, what a comeback. It's amazing how a team can play so well to come all the way back and take the lead in the fourth (and overtime) and then foul a lanky Russian taking a three pointer who hadn't scored all day. The Suns have become experts this year at snatching defeat from the jaws of victory (the Cardinals taught them well).

Also, great job in the 2nd quarter. I'm assuming the box score is a mistake because it says the Suns only had 11 points, that must be for one player, right? What, its for the whole team? Really? An NBA team. 11 points. Where's Howie Mendel, I know this is a joke. Cmon, bring out that comic genius, I want to shake his hand!

Suns burn out in Portland

2009-03-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

As great a game the Suns played on Wednesday, they played that badly on Thursday, taking a 129-109 beating from the Portland Trailblazers. The (for some reason) weary Suns hung in during the first half, trailing by 8 at the break, but fell apart in the third. Portland scored 35 points in the third and built the lead to 21, effectively ending the game. Brandon Roy, while he didn't score 52 like he typically does against the Suns, did contribute 26 points, 9 rebounds and 6 assists. He also proved yet again that any star player can pretty much have his way with the Suns. I would go over the list again but I really have to get to bed.

One good thing to come out of game may be Shaq's words for Robin Lopez. Sideshow Bob has contributed about three positive plays for the Suns this year and maybe Shaq will light a little fire under him. He ended the game 6 points and 3 rebounds, which is actually 5.9 points and 2.8 rebounds above his season average. So, good for him!

Suns muffle the Jazz

2009-03-25T22:02:00.000-07:00

The Suns beat the Jazz 118-114 on Wednesday night. It was an excellent night for the Suns to be on national TV, as they got a chance to show the nation how damn good they are playing. It was also a great night for the national audience to see the Jazz, and especially Mehmet Okur's goofy ass, lose a close game. The MVP of the game had to be Grant Hill, not only for his clutch fade away jumper in the final minute, but for a great game all around (26 points, 5 boards, 2 steals). The bench also played really well yet again, especially Louis Amundson (who now has his own crowd chant) and Goran "deep" Dragic (I'm totally calling the suns with that nickname idea). Finally, Jason Richardson (pictured above probably missing a dunk) had another solid game, scoring 21 points and hittinga couple shots late to help seal the game.

The Suns are once again the most exciting team in the NBA, but not for the same reasons as before. It's not the three pointers and highlight dunks by Amare, instead it's frantic defense, Shaq (just in general), and exciting bench players. Even if we only get 11 more games with this team this year, I'll enjoy each and every one of them.

P.S. Sorry to be so lovey-dovey I'm just excited after a big win!

The Cardinals may be HBO bound

2009-03-25T10:00:00.000-07:00

According to ProFootballTalk, there are rumors that the Cardinals are one of the teams being considered for the next season of HBO's Hard Knocks. The past two NFL seasons HBO has followed a team (and their drama) during training camp and made it into a reality show. Now, neither team that has been filmed has done much (Chiefs and Cowboys) but it would give the Cardinals some much needed exposure. Most people already know the big players after last year's run to the Superbowl, but I bet only about 10 people outside of Arizona have heard of Karlos Dansby or Gerald Hayes.

NCAA tournament announcing FTW

2009-03-24T13:40:00.000-07:00

Awful Announcing has an excellent article on the announcing so far in the NCAA tournament. I won't go into the critiques of each announcer (mostly because I don't know any of them except for Clark Kellogg and Jim Nantz) but the quotes section is amazing. Check the article for the full list, but some of the highlights are as follows:

"Most of the times you need a saddle to ride a guy like that"- Jay Bilas

"They don't necessarily have to score, but the ball has to touch the rim every time they are down there." - Clark Kellogg

“Hackett pops out wide open. And strokes it." – Gus Johnson

"A lot of DNA left on the floor tonight." – Tim Brando

Hockey stinks but...

2009-03-24T10:42:00.000-07:00

This is actually pretty funny. I'm a guy who enjoys a good meltdown every know and then (I could watch that Joe Namath clip all day, every day and be pretty happy). Take a look at this goalie's temper tantrum and try not to laugh:

If you didn't think it was funny when that milk crate came flying out, then I don't know what to tell you.

Thanks to With Leather for the inspiration.

Suns go mining for Nuggets

2009-03-23T21:58:00.000-07:00

The Suns came away with a 118-115 victory over the just-as-desperate Denver Nuggets on Monday night. I have no idea why the Suns are trying so damn hard, is there a special "Barely Made it Into the Playoffs and Got Pounded by the Lakers" trophy I don't know about? Because the Suns are playing pretty damn hard to get that first round exit.

Okay, enough of my complaining. It was a great win by the Suns, who beat the 4th best team in the west without two of their best players (who I heard were injured in a tragic bowling accident). The bench contributed yet again, I even saw one play where Goran Dragic made a pullup three-pointer and I could have sworn it looked identical to one of Steve Nash's. The Suns are finally starting to reap some benefits (keyword: some) from their younger players. It's gret to see and I'm excited to see it more.

One more quick stat for those who are still not convinced the Suns can make the playoffs: in the 11 days Dallas' lead has been cut from 6 games to 3 games, which I find incredible. As much as everyone thought the Suns were out of it after losing to the Mavericks a couple weeks ago, they are right back on the cusp.

Wildcats earn Sweet Sixteen spot

2009-03-22T14:27:00.000-07:00

The Wildcats are still dancing their way through the tournament with todays 71-57 beating of Cleveland State. The underrated Cats mounted too much momentum and with the help of their supporting cast have brought all doubters of the Arizona program to a mum silence. The game was won from the freethrow line with 24-for-28 shooting. Nic Wise increased his draft stock dropping 21 pts and 8 assists followed by Jordan Hill 16pts, Chase Buddinger 15 pts, and Jamelle Horn with 15 pts. The Wildcats are headed to the Sweet Sixteen for the 12th time since 1988. Arizona will be heading to Indianapolis to play the winner of the Siena vs Louisville game. Lets hope the Cats can keep up with this style of running and gunning.

Arizona State bows out to Syracuse

2009-03-22T12:46:00.000-07:00

On Sunday the Arizona State Sun Devils were knocked out of the NCAA tournament by the Syracuse Orangemen. Jonny Flynn (pictured above jumping about 20 feet in the air) was a pest all day for the Orange, scoring 11 points and handing out 7 assists. but it was Eric Devendorf who really killed the Devils, scoring 21 points, including 5 three pointers. The Suns Devils offense was stagnant at many points throughout the game, most likely puzzled by Syracuse's 2-3 zone. All-American James Harden had 10 points, 6 rebounds and 5 assists but you could have fooled me. All I saw him do was pass the damn ball to the wing every time he got it. I don't know if coach Herb Sendik told him to get his teammates involved, but he didn't seem interested and had no rhythm when he did shoot (especially in the first half). I know Syracuse was focused on shutting him down, but there was no creativity by ASU to get him the ball, and the few times Harden did get the ball he didn't do enough with it. This should be a great lesson for Sendik and Arizona State that you have those star players for a reason, and that reason is to pound them the damn ball come tournament time.

We still aren't in the playoff picture

2009-03-21T21:19:00.000-07:00

With all the excitement surrounding March Madness some of us forget that the Phoenix Suns are still playing. Yes our favorite team (although debatable) pulled out another high scoring win against the Washington Wizards 128 - 96 for their 4th straight win(the longest of the season, pathetic). The theme of tonight was J-Rich and blocked shots. Jason Richardson was heartbreak hotel from 3pt-land shooting 6 for 9 and ending the game with 35 pts. The Suns defense, yes we have it, managed to block 10 shots with seven different players. The Suns are now 3.5 games behind the Mavericks and every game is critical if we have ANY chance to make the playoffs. Although sometimes I think we are better off not making the playoffs and drafting somebody worthwhile. Our bench has done a great job showing how well they can play against teams in the league. It is promising to see that the Suns may become a deeper squad next year. Watch out.

Amare Stoudemire was in attendance to the game sporting a new outfit and aviators. He still wont be playing if we make the playoffs due to a retinal surgery. He was interviewed after the game and mentioned his healing process has been slow. He has promised to wear goggles for the rest of his career. If only he promised this earlier in the year after his incident with ex-Sun Boris Diaw. Leandro Barbosa was also in attendance to the game but did not play due to a contusion in his leg.

Shaq has passed Moses Malone to become fifth in all time scoring in the NBA.

Big win for ASU

2009-03-20T15:28:00.000-07:00

ASU escaped the first round of the NCAA tournament today with a 66-57 win over Temple. Somewhere Jon Chaney and his crazy ass are very upset that his Owls couldn't escape the Sun Devils. Dionte Christmas (pictured above probably about to hit another 30-foot three pointer) did everything humanly possible to lead the Owls to a win, but it wasn't enough thanks to both Derek Glasser and Jeff Pendergraph having 22 point games. Glasser, who had a career-high in points, came up big time and tie again for the Devils who will face Syracuse (aka Everyone's Favorite Team) on Sunday. A tough test for sure, and James Harden's karma should be well built up after he only made one field goal and had just 9 points against Temple.

March Madness day one highlight

2009-03-20T09:52:00.000-07:00

I can't stay long (there are 16 more games demanding my attention) but I had to post this ridiculous dunk that happened in the Gonzaga-Akron game. If you haven't seen it, shame on you. If you have, then you are a red-blooded American and a friend to me, enjoy.

Hook up that IV, it's March Madness time!

2009-03-19T07:00:00.000-07:00

That's right, kiddies, it's that time of year again. The time of year you fake an illness or totally phone in work, or just stay at home because you don't have a job and watch college basketball! So hook that IV of pure March Madness into your arm and enjoy 32 games in the next 48 hours, America, you've earned it!

Chris Cooley is honest

2009-03-18T15:00:00.000-07:00

With all the drama going on in Denver involving Jay Cutler, there are obviously going to be trade rumors. Some of those rumors involve the Washington Redskins and some have the 'Skins shipping Pro Bowl tight end Chris Cooley (pictured above in the blue) to Denver or Cleveland (as part of a 3-team deal). Mr. Cooley, who has a blog, didn't take very kindly to his named being mentioned and wrote about it:

It is rumored that there is a possible trade in the works for angry Jay Cutler. There were a couple different internet possibilities. The first would be with the Broncos, including Cutler and Scheffler for Campbell and myself. Another was a three way trade between the Browns and in that scenario Campbell and I would go to Cleveland, Cutler/Scheffler would come here and the Broncos would get Brady Quinn, someone else and draft pick.

Trade talk is a weird wake up at 6:30. Obviously something was said between teams to cause this internet trading shit storm. I would be pissed if I got my ass shipped to Cleveland.

I kind of wish more players would talk like this. Enough of the politically correct crap where they don't really say anything. Speak your mind, if you like where your at, say it (the hometown fans will effing love you for it). Imagine Anquan Boldin saying how much he loves Arizona and the people there. I bet 99% of Cardinals fans would immediately go to his side, rather than the roughly 50-50 split we have now.

Whitest.Dunk.Ever

2009-03-18T09:01:00.000-07:00

While it's a tragedy that Wyoming lost to Northeastern on Tuesday night, one good (and by "good" I mean, ridiculously hilarious) thing to come was Adam Waddell's dunk/backflip/possible injury. If there ever was any debate as to which race has the most athletic people, this should definitively put the caucausian's out of the running. Bookmark this page in case you have a bad day, because if you watch this you cannot help but feel better, both about yourself and just in general.

Lebron's other sidekick.... his EGO

2009-03-17T20:17:00.001-07:00

Oh how I remember the days when Lebron James was a blossoming new face in the NBA. Everybody liked him. I remember his humility, discipline, and respect he had for the game. Not that I am questioning Lebron's character, I think his play speaks for itself, he definitely has my MVP vote for this season. From his whining about calls (which I think he learned from a 1v1 game with Mike Brown) to his self centered post game interviews I am starting to think he is in love with himself. I've read plenty of his post game comments and this recent one has stuck out in my mind.

"That was just being confident. Being down one and taking a 3, a lot of people wouldn't have done that," James said. "I'm one of the guys who would do that. I knocked it down."
-In reference to a 3pter he made aganist the Magic at home to put them up 2 with 47 seconds left.

OK Lebron.... surrrrrre. I think there are plenty of people who would have taken that shot... I think there are at least 29 players. One on every team other than your own, Mr. James. Hell there could be even more because some teams have more than 1 star. Point being, self proclaiming yourself to greatness is by far your most selfish flaw. Any bystander can witness your greatness... nobody cares to see you gloat about it. As a matter of fact Mr. James I think I can name one player that outshines even yourself this year (when it comes to closing out big games). His name is Kobe Bryant. So before you put yourself on some throne of untouchability(don't think this is a word) try to think before you speak.

UPDATE:

Another douchebag quote:

"I think I was probably the only guy — and I'm not trying to praise myself — but I was the only guy that didn't give up on the play," James said.

If you don't want the recognition bron bron then zip it. Don't act like you are the only one going out there and giving 100%. Way to put your team down. Matter of fact remember you couldn't carry your team to a championship alone. Polarizing your team is a great way to improve the teams chemistry. +1 to you.
Thanks to alex for this quote.

These are worth at least 2 wins

2009-03-17T09:14:00.000-07:00

ProFootballTalk has the scoop on what could be the Detroit Lions new jerseys (pictured above, obviously). Now, I don't have a huge problem with the Lions current jerseys, (except those disgusting ones they like to wear on Thanksgiving) but these looks pretty damn cool. They look a little like Arena League jerseys, but who are we kidding, the Lions are basically an Arena team anyway. If these designs came to be, I wouldn't be against buying a Lions player jersey, if theys ever had a player worth getting a jersey of, that is.

Enough with these already

2009-03-17T08:58:00.000-07:00

M&Ms have come out with the above photo commemorating Magic Johnson and Larry Bird's epic 1979 NCAA matchup. And what better way to commemorate it then making creepy digital M&M versions of both men (that really look nothing like them, especially Magic).

Look, the first time I saw the red and yellow M's they were pretty cool (with Santa and all that). But now we have the green one that all the guy M&M's want to bang, and now celebrity M&M's, it's getting a little ridiculous. Maybe just stick to making delicious candy that sometimes contains peanuts in the center and forget about all your wacky cartoon characters (those dark chocolate ones are pretty good too. Mmmm, dark chocolate).

Arizona State weekend highlights!

2009-03-16T10:00:00.000-07:00

U of A got pwned...again! - Oh it feels good to watch ASU beat Arizona for a third time. It's a lot like yelling at my family members: I could do it every day and not feel bad about it afterwards.

ASU finally beat Washington - It felt so great to see that fat load John Brockman (and his stupid blank stare and his weird run) finally lose to ASU on Friday. The Devils avenged two of their most painful losses of the year when they beat the Huskies (now if only they could find a way to hit a 35-foot three pointer to beat Washington St.)

The Devils cannot hold a lead - For a second straight night the Sun Devils got out to a huge lead only to blow it in the second half. This time, unfortunately, the Devils couldn't retake the lead and lost the Pac-10 Championship game to the USC Trojans. The good news is the Devils seem to be playing good ball heading into the tournament. Also, it seems ASU has done everything in their power to keep U of A out of the tournament. In particular, beating Arizona three times and then letting another bubble team get an automatic NCAA bid.

ASU is a 6 seed - After getting jobbed last year, Arizona State made sure it wouldn't happen again this time. The Devils ended their season 24-9 including many impressive wins and have earned a 6 seed in the NCAA tournament. They will face the Temple Owls in the first round in the South region (the game will be in Memphis, TN).

Although, I am flabbergasted the selection committee didn't find some way to give Arizona a higher seed than them. I heard talk of a new "No Devils" rule, but it was narrowly shot down in favor of the "Give every Big East team a #1 seed" rule.

More anything? More everything!

2009-03-15T22:06:00.000-07:00

The Suns finished their 154-130 drubbing of the Golden State Warriors earlier tonight and boy what a game it was. The Suns set the NBA season-high for points in a game and effectively ended the game in the third quarter by outscoring the Warriors 46-25. Shaquille O'Neal (pictured above after hearing Robin Lopez call himself a Center) had a pretty good game, scoring 26 points in only 23 minutes. The best thing about the game may be that Alvin Gentry managed to get 12 players in the game (wait, do the Suns even have that many people on the roster? Did Steve Kerr suit up or something?).

I'll admit, I had to look hard for some negative in this game. I do feel kind of bad for the Suns announcers who are charged with the task of giving the fans (and themselves) hope for the Suns to make the playoffs. The only thing more unlikely than the Suns being in the playoffs is Tony Kornheiser making it through an episode of PTI without an American Idol reference.

The USA sucks (at baseball)

2009-03-15T19:00:00.000-07:00

In the most embarrassing moment in United States history since Reindeer Games, the U.S. baseball team got pounded 11-1 by Puerto Rico. Puerto effing Rico. Don't we literally own them? Couldn't Obama have jumped in during the 5th inning and just arrested everybody involved in their team? Or at least arrested their family members and distracted him

I can only imagine the reason for this loss was that we wanted to give all the other countries (and U.S. owned territories) in the world a day to think they are actually better than us.

Guess who almost lost again?

2009-03-15T17:00:00.000-07:00

Hint, it's that team in purple and orange! The Suns fought hard and beat the 18-48 Thunder on Saturday night, even though they would have probably been better to lose. The Suns are now a whole 4 games above .500, 5 games away from the playoffs and 6 games ahead of the next best lottery team. It is the definition of "worst.position.ever".

The only thing that would be worse is if the Suns were over the salary cap NEXT year. But that can't possibly be true. What's that, it is? Haha good one, man. No, seriously, they aren't, are they? They're $9 million over!?!?

So this game was pretty good

2009-03-13T10:00:00.000-07:00

Syracuse beat Connecticut on Thursday in what many considered a decent college basketball game. There was an overtime or something and Syracuse ended up winning (they were the team in orange, right?). I'm not gonna lie, I was in kind of a hurry when researching this story, my buddy told me there was this good game going on but I was too busy on Icanhascheezburger. Anyways, if I'm missing anything feel free to email me.

Suns Drop 6 In a Row

2009-03-12T22:24:00.000-07:00

The losing streak hits six with a 119-111 loss to the Cavaliers. The Suns made a valiant effort however found another way to lose on national television. I think the team realizes they wont be making the playoffs and the level of play has shown itself to be mediocre at best. Sure the Suns have their surges but they are cut short due to their lack of defending and panicked offense. The Suns have nothing to play for and even if they did make the playoffs it would be a quick first round exit to the Lakers (who by the way beat the Spurs tonight). On another note I never have seen Lebron bitch about so many calls. What surprises me is how he evades any technical fouls for his mouth.

That's another thing.. there seems to be a double standard for officiating. An open court 360 dunk that J-Rich had was "blocked" by Lebron was far from a block. The replay showed he hacked J-Rich's wrist... no call. I think the NBA needs to seriously take a look the inconsistencies of NBA officials. I do not believe in makeup calls, get it right the first time. Star players should not be subject to looser rules than any other player. The integrity of the game is fairly being questioned.

Lebron James 34 pts 10 Reb 13 Ast
Mo Williams 30 pts
Steve Nash 20 pts 6 Ast

Some kids got sued

2009-03-12T13:00:00.000-07:00

I know this isn't a legal news website or anything like that (let's be honest, it's barely a REGULAR website) but the following story does involve a football, so I'm deeming it relevant to sports.

Apparently, some children were playing football in their neighborhood when their ball flew into the yard of 89-year-old Edna Jester. Edna (who you can immediately tell is old because no mother has named their child "Edna" in the last 70 years) was sick of all the fun being had and decided to keep the football to herself (that or she was mad because she wanted to play fullback in high school). So the kids, being logical and not over-the-top, had Edna arrested for petty theft. Edna's response? She, of course, sued those little bastards for emotional distress. If this is what Edna does when a football lands in her yard, I would hate to see what she does if someone doesn't clean up after their dog in her lawn (It probably involves several sticks of dynamite).

The Suns are Coke Zero

2009-03-12T10:00:00.000-07:00

With Malice has a great article that compares each NBA team to food. The comparisons are very poignant and on point (and delicious!). Some of the best ones are your Phoenix Suns:

16. Phoenix Suns: Coke Zero. Tries to be like Coke but despite every effort, everyone knows it isn't the real thing...

Also the New Orleans Hornets:

9. New Orleans Hornets: Nachos. They're good, but won't keep you full for very long. If eaten as a main dish, you'll notice that something's missing...

And the Orlando Magic:

4. Orlando Magic: Jam Filled Donut. By intself is already nice but it's center is where it's completely awesome...

Being a huge fan of metaphors, I ate this article up (wakka wakka!). Click above for the full list of teams.

Baseball was not very, very good to them

2009-03-11T07:35:00.001-07:00

The Netherlands defeated the Dominican Republic 2-1 in 11 innings on Tuesday night to eliminate the Dom. Rep. from the World Baseball classic. This is a huge upset not because the Dominican Republic has a ridiculous lineup (Yankees 2b Robinson Cano was hitting 7th, to give you an idea), but because they got beat by the freakin' Netherlands. For God's sake, 90% of the Netherlands economy is from marijuana and hookers (I didn't look this up but I assume it's pretty accurate). I'm surprised they even found 9 players that wanted to leave the friendly confines of Amsterdam to play in this stupid tournament. I heard they almost had to use a cardboard box with a glove stapled to it as a second basemen. He's a good player but he just can't turn two as well as the other guys.

Disaster in the Desert

2009-03-11T00:33:00.000-07:00

The Suns have completed a five game slide and are now five games behind the Mavericks for a playoff spot after a tough fought 122-117 loss at home to Dallas. The combination of Dirk(34 pts) and Terry(25 pts) was just too much to handle. It's pretty obvious the Suns are just not complete without their power-forward and that any game is just a futile battle till the end. I gotta give them credit though they have not given up like they had under Porter. With 18 games left in the season there is still hope that the Nuggets, Hornets, Blazers, and maybe even the Mavericks will start racking up losses. That is very unlikely though. Lets pray for a win on TNT on Thursday when we play King James.... My fingers are crossed.

The Suns almost got this guy

2009-03-10T11:00:00.000-07:00

Portland Trailblazer guard Rudy Fernandez got fouled pretty hard last night by the Lakers Trevor Ariza. Actually, after taking a second look, Fernandez got bumped on the head and nearly flew into the second row. Now I'm not scientist, but a slap to the head shouldn't make you completely lose your balance and cause your arms to stop working. Fernandez, for some reason, decided to flail and use his back to soften the fall instead of using his hands like a normal human. Take another look, and read With Leather's synopsis here.

Sir Charles was in a tent for 30 minutes

2009-03-10T10:00:00.000-07:00

Got a lot of free time, huh? Gonna do your time, huh? He was in there for 36 hours, I've had bowel movements last longer than that. I bet if you take away time for processing, signing autographs and showers, it's like 20 minutes. Wait, I forgot fingerprinting, make it 18 minutes.

D-Weezy for sheezy

2009-03-10T09:00:00.000-07:00

Dwayne Wade is effing ridiculous, that's all there is to it. I know it was the Bulls, but if he did that against my junior high team it would still be the greatest thing I've ever seen. It's a little bit of a bummer watching guys like Wade, Chris Paul, Lebron, Darren Williams, Brandon Roy, and Kevin Durant just dominate while the Suns awkwardly sit in Playoffs/Lottery limbo. The only thing more disappointing is the fact that the Suns could have had so many damn good young players, yet decided to do things like ship Kurt Thomas and two first rounders for some cap space.

P.S. I want one of those "El Heat" jerseys. FTW.

Cardinals sign another Steeler

2009-03-09T11:00:00.000-07:00

The Cardinals made their first move outside their own organization on Sunday, inking 2-time champion cornerback Bryant McFadden to a 2 year, $10 million deal. McFadden chose the Cardinals over suitors like the Steelers and Eagles. This is huge news for the Cardinals, as just a few years ago free agents were choosing make believe teams over the Cardinals. Remember that guy who signed with the Neverland Unicorns over the Cards?

TGISports weekend highlights

2009-03-09T09:00:00.000-07:00

Enough with this douchebag - David Beckham is constantly in the news, despite almost never playing soccer. The latest news is because he refuses to play in the U.S. or something, but then he came back to play. The one thing I DO know is that if I never hear the words "Posh and Becks" again, I'll be a happy young man.

T.O. to the Bills - In "He went to WHAT team" news, noted pill popper Terrell Owens signed with the Buffalo Bills this weekend. This should give a major boost to one team that managed to be LESS relevant than the Cardinals, before this year of course (boo ya!).

Arizona finally wins - the University of Arizona beat Stanford on Saturday night to finish 9-9 in the Pac-10 and 19-12 overall. Despite losing 4 of their last five games, Arizona will still probably make the NCAA tournament. They can send their thanks to Maryland and Kentucky, both of whom had terrible losses on Saturday. Actually, to be honest, I bet the NCAA would find a way to put the Wildcats in the tournament no matter how many damn games they lost (and find a way to keep ASU out of the tournament as well).

Spurs beat the Suns yet again

2009-03-09T08:00:00.000-07:00

In what was the least shocking event on Sunday, the Spurs defeated the Suns 103-98 in San Antonio. The Suns lost yet another close game, a game in which they led during the 4th quarter. All 5 starters were in double figures for the Suns, but it wasn't enough. Mr. Longoria-Parker went off for 30 points and 9 assists (my prediction was a bit off, I thought he'd go for 128 and 31). The French rapper was almost unstoppable, draining jumpers and driving to the hoop all day. Even without Manu Ginobili (aka Flopmaster General), the Spurs were able to suffocate the Suns on defense and score at will on offense. Next up for the Suns are the Mavericks at home on Tues...who am I kidding, the Suns have zero shot at making the post season. Next up for the Suns are several ping pong balls, let's just face facts.

Thanks to GrubGrade

2009-03-07T08:38:00.000-08:00

We here at TGISports just wanted to give a big thank you to Ryan over at GrubGrade.com. The site is great and for a fast food lover (like me) it's even better. Be sure to check out his site when you get a chance.

Lottery or bust!

2009-03-06T21:37:00.000-08:00

The Suns lost again on Friday night, this time by just two to the Houston Rockets. Steve Nash (picture above telling Aaron Brooks to "suck it!!") played a hell of a game, scoring 32 points and dishing out 13 assists. After the way the Suns, Wildcats and Sun Devils have been playing lately, the Coyotes seem to be the best team in the Valley at the moment. Now I'm not a religious man, but I believe that "Nostradomus' 5th sign that the end of the world is something like "A purgatory of sports, save the Coyotes, will beseach Arizona". Number 4 was "Thou Cardinals shalt reach thy Super duper Bowl".

Guess who stinks...

2009-03-06T10:00:00.000-08:00

Yup, it's both Arizona teams! Both Arizona State and the University of Arizona lost on Thursday night, the 3rd straight for ASU and 4th for U of A. Arizona State's loss is more surprising, considering they lost to Stanford, whom they beat by 30 freakin' points earlier this year (at Stanford!). Apparently Herb Sendik's strategy for the NCAA tournament is to just barely get there and hopefully be knocked out in the first weekend. You don't expect him to miss Spring Break, do you?!

Suns go 1-2 on He Hate Me tour

2009-03-05T10:00:00.000-08:00

After an impressive win on Sunday against the Lakers, the Suns quickly reverted to their old selves and lost to Orland and Miami on back to back nights. Dwayne Wade (as predicted) went off for 19 in the first quarter and 35 for the game. Apparently quality Guards in the NBA circle the Suns on their calendars because they are guaranteed the best game of their season. Don't believe me? See Devin Harris, Tony Parker, Chris Paul, Kobe Bryant, Dwayne Wade, and Rajon Rondo.

Pwned

2009-03-05T06:21:00.000-08:00

It's just sad when bad things happen to good people. Terrell Owens was *sniff* cut Wednesday night in what may be the saddest story of the year. Don't worry though, friendos, because ProFootballTalk is reporting that the suitors may already be lining up. On the top of the list is the Washington Redskins, a team that loves signing lots of free agents then stinking it up during the season. Let's hope this holds true one more time.

Finally

2009-03-04T12:11:00.000-08:00

Finally, the Cardinals and Kurt Warner have ended their game of Chicken and agree on a 2 year, $23 million deal. The only surprising part of the deal is the $19 million guaranteed to Warner. This is a great move by the Cardinals not only to ink their Pro Bowl, but also to allow them to move the heck on to other concerns. What concerns you ask? Well, extending Adrian Wilson, courting and signing Bryant McFadden, solving Anquan Boldin's situation, and finding a running back for starters. Then they can decide what to do with Matt Leinart, who will almost certainly desire a trade. Thank goodness the Cards didn't waste 5 days on a pointless task that could have been done before free agency even started...oh wait.

ASU dropped a couple seeds

2009-03-02T10:00:00.000-08:00

Two games, two overtime losses for the Arizona State basketball team this week. The second one came on Saturday afternoon in which the soon-to-be-unranked Sun Devils lost to Washington State after a last second 28-point three pointer. I don't know spell what the Washington schools put on ASU but it seems to be working. If only I could figure out which one it is and put it on some of the Suns' opponents.

Warner is still a free agent

2009-03-02T08:00:00.000-08:00

3 more days, still no word on when or if Kurt Warner will sign with the Cardinals. Obviously the Cardinals need to resign their Pro Bowl quarterback, and obviously Warner is trying to get some more leverage by visiting San Francisco this week. I assume (read: hope) that this is just a ploy to get the Cardinals worried and to up their offer, but let me just say this first: if Warner signs with the 49ers, he will be the most hated athlete in Arizona, I'm talkin' Robert Horry hate. Well, maybe not that much, but he'd better find a place in SF awful quick 'cause he won't be wanted here anymore.

Mr. Twitter pounds the Lakers

2009-03-02T00:01:00.000-08:00

The big story on ESPN all Sunday was how damn impressive Shaquille O'neal has looked the past two games for the Suns, and I can't argue. 78 points in two games is amazing for anybody, especially a guy who spends most of his time playing hide-and-go-seek with fans. His latest feat was 33 points against the Western Conference-leading Lakers in a 118-111 win. A game in which the Suns played without both Amare and Steve Nash, the home team came up with a very impressive performance, building as much as a 14 point lead at one point. The Suns were pushed to the brink by Kobe and his 49 freakin' points, but ultimately closed out the Lakers very well in the 4th. Although it could have been significantly easier if they made their damn free throws, instead of going 26-42 (62%).

Also turning in a great game was Matt Barnes, who almost compiled a triple double with 26 points, 10 rebounds and 7 assists. This guy just may prove to be the best player for the money in the NBA, as he is only making about $800,000 this year (according to ESPN). What is the worst player for the money you ask? Look towards our nation's capital and Gilbert Arenas $111 million contract. Yikes.

ASU is so close!

2009-02-27T06:48:00.001-08:00

Oh, how great it would have been for the Sun Devils to win Thursday night's game against Washington. Although I did almost had a heart attack when James Harden stole that pass with about 15 seconds left in regulation. It looks like the Devils will continue their string of never winning a Pac-10 title. The good news is we won't have to worry about winning a title in future years either, once Harden leaves ASU for the NBA (as he should). Now the Devils must win their final three Pac-10 games and Washington has to lose their final two for ASU to win the Pac-10 title. In short, Washington just won the damn conference last night. Nice work, John Brockman, you fat load, I hope you enjoy your last few games this year 'cause you sure as hell aren't playing in the Association.

Friday round-up

2009-02-26T21:03:00.000-08:00

Why waste your Friday reading ENTIRE stories, when you can read just the good stuff!

U of A loses - A shocking loss for a terrible team (and school) on Thursday night as the Arizona Wildcats lose 69-53 to the Washington State Cougars. It's hard to top having your face stepped on, but this may be the most embarrassing moment of Arizona's season. Nah, it's still the face stepping.

Suns lose as expected - I feel bad for the Suns players healthy enough to have their asses beat down by the Lakers on Thursday. Then I look at my paycheck and go back to being angry at them. Final score: 1032-106 (yah, it was ugly).

Warner hasn't signed - In what will continue to be an interesting story, Cardinals QB Kurt Warner has yet to ink a deal with the Cardinals (or any other team for that matter). My bet is this situation will be resolved quickly and he will sign with the Cards. I have a great history on this kind of thing, too, I bet my life savings on Antonio McDyess resigning with the Suns and I think that worked out pretty darn well.

Free agency starts Friday

2009-02-25T13:00:00.000-08:00

The free agency period in the NFL starts this Friday and, like many teams, the Cardinals really have their work cut out for them. They already took care of one of their big questions, which they solved by tagging Karlos Dansby. While their biggest priority is still to resign Kurt Warner, it was nice to get this issue out of the way (for now). And while free agency is a big part of the off season, the Cardinals still have the whole Anquan Boldin situation to settle. Needless to say I wouldn't want to be in Michael Bidwill or Rod Grave's shoes (probably because my feet are way too big for them, oh!). Sorry about that.

Below is a list of the Cardinals' free agents (from profootballtalk.com) with my expert opinion on what to do with each player. I know, I should be charging for this advice, but I'm in a giving mood.

QB Kurt Warner - Of course you resign him
TE Leonard Pope (restricted) - not a big priority to keep him, draft a TE or use Spach
DT Gabe Watson (restricted) - keep him, he's getting better and isn't fat as hell anymore
RB J.J. Arrington - If you can get him cheap, resign
LB Monty Beisel - Not a bad backup LB, saw him playing in the playoffs
DE Bertrand Berry - Should resign him, but may not
OL Elton Brown - Keep him for cheap if you can, otherwise find a new O-lineman
CB Ralph Brown - I'd rather have Rod Hood, but he's okay for nickel coverage
LB Karlos Dansby (franchised) - Now that Suggs is tagged, he's your best option by far at LB
P Ben Graham - He played much better than Dirk Johnson, pay him
CB Eric Green - Call a bus to get this guy out of town asap
LB Clark Haggans - He's been hurt way too often, keep him only if he's cheap
OL Scott Peters - No idea who this is, see ya
DE Antonio Smith - Keep him unless he wants Julius Peppers money, which he might
FB Terrelle Smith - Seems like a great guy but he's still a FB
QB Brian St. Pierre - Sure, why not?

Suns win, but wait theres more!

2009-02-25T06:26:00.000-08:00

First off, the good news. The Suns beat the Bobcats Tuesday night 112-102 to exercise some of the demons from trade made earlier this season. If you remember, the Suns took a beating from these same Bobcats just weeks after trading them Raja Bell and Boris Diaw. This time, the new style helped the Suns to victory, which was led by Jason Richardson and Steve Nash (pictured above trying something called "defense").

Now the bad news. Both Richardson and Nash were hampered by ankle injuries they suffered during the Bobcats game, and had to leave at some point. The good news is both came back to contribute a bit more before the game was over, but that just adds 2 more to the Suns injury total for the season. It's getting to be ridiculous, the line for the trainer's room at U.S. Airways center must look like one of those clown cars where 30 people get out of a Volkswagen Bug.

Hayneswsorth is SO gonna get paid

2009-02-24T15:26:00.000-08:00

Rumors are swirling today that the Redskins are going to give Albert Haynesworth more money than Scrooge McDuck has. From Yahoo!:

My source tells me to look for a contract that could break $100 million with an average of $15 million to $16 million per.

Wow, that's a hell of a lot of money to invest on a guy who got in trouble for auto-related incidents twice in one week and tried to peel the skin off Andre Gurode's face in 2006. Yah, he's had two amazing years but is that worth $100 million? Let's not forget this is the same Redskins ownership group that gave Adam Archuleta and Brandon Lloyd ridiculous money a couple years ago. Do me a favor, check the 'Skins roster and see if either of those players are still there (hint: they're not!)

As a Cardinals fan I'm happy to hear this for two reasons: It's not the Cardinals giving him $15 million a year and that the Redskins are not in the NFC West. If Haynesworth continues to play like he has in '07 and '08 I don't want any part of him.

A quick message from TGISports

2009-02-23T06:44:00.000-08:00

Just a quick note, Anyluckyday.com is giving away a year membership to thebizwebcoach.com and it looks like a great opportunity. Anyluckyday is a website that gives away free items all the time and all that is required from you is a quick comment on the site. Hopefully the Biz Web Coach membership goes to someone who could really use the help (i.e. Me!) and is put to good use. Check out the site and contest here: http://anyluckyday.com/contest-of-the-day-thebizwebcoach-membership#more-729

Welcome to Suckville, population: U of A

2009-02-22T23:00:00.000-08:00

The Arizona State Sun Devils just finished up their 4th straight win over the Arizona Wildcats, which came in a hard fought game from Wells Fargo Arena. Now I would love to berate the Wildcats and their fans for how horrible they are as a team and human beings, but they played a pretty darn good game and were actually pretty classy.

Back to the game. Led by (big shock) James Harden's 18 points, the Devils decided to make it interesting in the 2nd half by giving up a 17 point lead, only to take it back in the final minutes. Jeff Pendergraph and Rihards Kuksiks also added 16 and 17 points, respectively. Chase Buddinger, or as I call him "The Human Stairstepper" actually had a good game, scoring 13 points and snagging 9 rebounds. The-one-without-pigment seemed to be in on every big play for Arizona, although it wasn't enough to notch his teams's 8th straight win. Both teams head to Washington next week in what will probably determine their NCAA fate.

Oh, I just thought of another name for Chase Buddinger, Ab-white-ham Lincoln. Cause of the beard. Am I right, am I right?

Celtics stomp the Suns

2009-02-22T21:20:00.000-08:00

After pounding 3 crappy teams this past week, the Suns proved Sunday they still have a lot of work to do. The KG-less Boston Celtics came into U.S. Airways Center on Sunday and treated the suns like a latrine, coasting to a 128-108 victory. Rajon Rondo (pictured above playing like Jordan, Magic, and Kareem all wrapped into one) scored a career-high 32 points for the Celts, who simply looked a step ahead of the Suns on a lot of possessions. I know losing Amar'e is a huge deal, but it was almost a fair trade (in more ways than one) seeing as Boston was without Kevin Garnett. Let's hope Alvin Gentry, or "Our Savior", as Phoenix has apparently annointed him, can actually beat a good team before the season is over (something the previous two coaching staffs had huges problems doing).

By the way, I'm looking at the box score right now and apparently the Suns have someone named Courtney Sims, who played 1:59 of the game. Does anyone in Phoenix know who this guy is? Are the Suns so desperate for players they're just picking them up off the street. If so, I'm available! I'll play for cheap too, just 500k this year with a 10k bonus for every time I get horribly embarrassed on the floor. It won't happen a lot, I swear!

The Suns still have a shot

2009-02-21T12:30:00.000-08:00

Even though the news came down on Friday that Amar'e Stoudemire is out for 8 weeks after being poked in the eye this past week against the Clippers, the Suns still managed to pound Kevin Durant and the Thunder 140-118. Led by Leandro Barbosa's (pictured about to sing "Yeah" with Ludacris and Lil Jon) 41 points, the Suns reached the 140 point mark for an impressive third straight game. Let's hope this is a sign of things to come because Barbosa, Matt Barnes, Jason "no seatbelt" Richardson, Louis Amundson, Chris Dudley, and even Al McCoy all are going to have to step up if the Suns want to even sniff the playoffs. Talk about another terrible break for the Suns, who, as a franchise, now have reason to swear off coinflips, benches AND The Three Stooges (nyuck nyuck nyuck!).

Cardinals drama in full swing!

2009-02-18T18:38:00.000-08:00

Dansby gets tagged - The Red Birds tagged Linebacker Karlos Dansby for the second straight year. Not a bad move by the Cardinals but I'm sure Dansby is not thrilled by it. How can a Superbowl team have so many disgruntled players? (not sure what I'm talking about, see below!)

Edge is grumpy - Edgerrin James remains a Cardinal despite the fact that both he and the team have shown signs that they will part ways (especially Edge). Apparently Edge hasn't even been to Arizona since before the Superbowl, moving all his stuff to Miami. Look, we get it Edge, you love Miami University, but your like 45 now, you're not a college freshmen looking for some young co-ed that you can impress by telling them your on the football team and could probably start this year, if you work really hard that is.

New coaches! - I'm not going to go into detail of all the Cardinals coaching changes, because I almost blew my brains out reading about them myself, and I'd hate to lose any loyal TGISports readers because of my ignorance. The gist is this, they lost both coordinators and hired NOBODY. A bold strategy, Cotton, let's hope it pays off.

ASU is UCLA's daddy

2009-02-13T08:00:00.000-08:00

Last night, the Sun Devils did what has been near impossible the past few years, and completed the season sweet of UCLA by winning 74-67 Thursday night at Wells Fargo Arena. The only thing more surprising than an ASU team beating UCLA twice in the same season is if the football team beat ANY team from California. Ever.

And by the way, I want to congratulate whoever created the "If you touch the ball while the inbounder still has it, its a two shot technical foul" rule. I'm not downplaying the win at all, but without that call on Alfred Aboyo, the Devils would have had a much tougher time winning that game. Next up for the Devils is USC, who just finished coughing up a game to the U of A, who I'm sure will somehow manage to secure a higher seed than ASU in the NCAA tournament, despite the fact that they are terrible.

All hail king James

2009-02-11T19:34:00.000-08:00

"Fools gold". It's what Shaq warned fans about after we routed the Kings but it seems our ineffective coaching, lack of effort, and inane desire to turn the ball over has got the best of us. Wednesday's 109-92 capitulation to the Cleveland Cavaliers is a sight oh too familiar to the followers of the Phoenix franchise. Granted the Suns were missing their two-time MVP Steve Nash the result is something that not even Zeus(Michael Jordan?) himself could overcome. Although the 28-23 Suns are only a half game behind the Jazz for the 8th spot in the West the problems that have been surfacing may be here to stay.

Suprisingly it wasn't King James that eviscerated us, but rather his under appreciated sidekick in scoring, Mo Williams. Mo lit us up for 44 points shooting 69% from the field and 7 for 9 from 3 point land proving to the league he deserves that All-Star stamp.

Terry Porter is everything thats wrong with the Suns. His inability to incorporate his two big men (Shaq and Amare) into the game compounded by the fact the Suns turned over the ball 25 times in the game only laments his inability to coach. I for one am sick of seeing the Suns wave the white flag after the 3rd quarter. The talent is definitely there but the execution of a plan, if there is any, makes my prostate groan. Terry Porter's only skills are that he bitches about calls, yells "Come On Guys!" while down 15+ points, and shines his bald head void of any intelligence. His lack of leadership is a direct result of his lack of respect from his players. The team does not want to play for this loser but the organization(Loser #1 Sarver and Loser #2 Kerr ) are too proud to admit to their mistakes. Instead of being the underdog rooted for by NBA fans we have become the joke of the league.

With all the trade talk and uncertainty surrounding Phoenix don't expect the Suns to get better any time this decade. All I have to say is that the idiots that got us into this situation are the same idiots we are going to have to weather the storm with. Trading away our talent is not gonna get us better anytime soon. So strap on your ponchos Phoenix, not because of the weather, but because the shits only beginning to hit the fan. In other news Lebron James is dedicating a park in Phoenix this All-Star weekend.

Noteables:
Amare Stoudemire 27 pts 6 reb 3 blk
Lebron James 26 pts 6 reb 6 ast
Mo Williams 44 pts 7 ast

-isocrazy

The Suns put up a fight

2008-12-10T22:53:00.001-08:00

After the news came down on Wednesday afternoon that the Suns traded Raja Bell and Boris Diaw for Jason Richardson, it would be easy for the Suns to have gone down easy to the Lakers on Wednesday. They only had 8 active players and just played a game on Tuesday night, it was a perfect setup for a blowout in L.A. But the Suns fought valiently, although they lost 115-110 to the now 18-3 Lakers. Amare had his 3rd straight good game, scoring 21 and grabbing 11 boards. Next up are the Magic on Friday, and who knows how many players the Suns will have by that time. My bet is they'll be down to 4 and Terry Porter will have to suit up and dish out some dimes.

The Yankees overpaid

2008-12-10T21:00:00.001-08:00

It was announced on Wednesday that the Yankees signed pitcher/fat guy C.C. Sabathia to a 7-year/$161 million contract. Why the hell would you pay this guy that much? He had a good month, then got tired, then got pounded in the playoffs. It's amazing his fat ass could even make it through the negotiations without having a heart attack. I heard from a reliable source (myself) that his diet mainly consists of oreos and whatever else he can fit into his deep fryer.

TGISports weekend highlights

2008-12-08T12:00:00.000-08:00

Mike Tomlin is a handsome devil - If there was an award for best dressed coach, Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin (pictured above looking awesome) would have zero competition. The only question I would have is where can I buy that exact outfit and how many consecutive days can I wear it before I'd have to wash it.

The Suns actually beat a good team - In even more surprising news, Amare Stoudemire got off the phone with his agent long enough to grab some rebounds against the Jazz on Saturday (20 to be exact). Maybe this will calm the "Trade Amare" calls on talk radio for a day or two. Or, it will just increase his trade value, woo!

Ed Reed is ridiculous - how much would the Cardinals need to trade to get this guy? Like 4 first round pick? I'd give whatever they wanted, this guy is amazing.

The Orange Bowl is terrible...again - In a year where the other 4 BCS bowl games all look amazing, the Orange Bowl yet again has two teams that don't belong in a national spotlight. Cincinnati vs. Virginia Tech may look okay on paper (they ARE the #12 and #19 teams in the country) but really, who gives a damn about this game besides people in Ohio and Virginia? Nobody, that's who. Throw Texas Tech and Boise St. in there and starting counting the Benjamins. You DO know it's all about those Benjis, right? By the way, the last three Orange Bowls are listed below, tell me if any of these sound exciting:

2006	Penn St. vs Florida St.
2007	Louisville vs Wake Forest
2008	Kansas vs Virginia Tech

Cardinals win their division, pigs proceed to fly

2008-12-08T11:00:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's true. The "Same 'ole Cardinals" have won the NFC west and will host a playoff games (something that hasn't happened since 19-freakin'-47 (World War II ended in 1945 just to give some historical reference). The Cardinals played a pretty good game, with Warner's interception being the only negative all day. The defense (who have just dominated the NFC West) came up with 2 huge turnovers for touchdowns (DRC might just be my favorite player) and helped to cover for the offense's inability to stay on the field in the second half. Now all that the Cards have to worry about is which see they'll be in the playoffs, and a win next week over Minnesota (who can be up and down, especially on the road) would got a long way to securing at least a #3 seed (which would prevent them from playing the Giants until the NFC Championship game, if they are so lucky).

By the way, I'm having an epic battle with myself from not buying 20 of these and giving them to everyone I know.

Edge = Akon

2008-12-03T10:00:00.000-08:00

Yep, both Cardinals running back Edgerrin James are "locked up." Akon in the literal sense, and Edge in the figurative. Apparently not starting is James' worst nightmare as he recently made these comments to AZCentral's Kent Somers:

James took advantage of the long weekend and went back home to Florida. A local paper caught up with him there. Edge told the paper he was anxious to leave the Cardinals. "I'm just waiting for my release....like an inmate."

Look man, I get that you're a competitor and want to play, but shut the hell up. Do you see Matt Leinart running his mouth about how he wants to leave and can't believe he lost his starting job? No, and he has just as much right (if not more) to be upset about losing his starter status. I know Tim Hightower hasn't been very good the last couple games, but it's hard to get much down when you're down 21-0 in the first quarter or only get 12 carries a game. I hope Scott Boras is making some calls because the SECOND the season is up, your ass is out of AZ.

The Giants are a mess but damn are they good

2008-12-02T15:11:00.001-08:00

By now everyone has heard about New York Giants' wide receiver Plaxico Burress problems over the weekend (and by 'problems' I mean he wasn't able to stop from shooting himself in the thigh) but it was revealed today that Giants wide receiver Steve Smith was robbed at gunpoint this past Tuesday. My goodness, how can a team be in such disarray off the field, but continue to dominate on the field? The only way this could make sense is it it balances out some place else. Like,somewhere in the world there must be a team of devout Mormons in last place, or a charity that is under investigation by the FBI.

TGISports late weekend highlights

2008-12-01T11:00:00.000-08:00

Football is #1 - Some great games again this weekend. Anybody who says that the NBA or MLB or NHL or NASCAR or anything else is better than the NFL should be brutally beaten (picture Adam Sandler after he said 'The price is wrong, bitch'). Almost every damn game comes down to the final minutes, and even the ones that don't are very entertaining.

Where can I get a James Harden jersey? - after losing to Baylor (thanks to a ridiculous barrage of 3's) early Saturday morning, ASU beat up on UTEP on Sunday, thanks mostly to James Harden's 40 points. I couldn't believe how high ASU was ranked to start the season, but after watching this guy play this season, it's hard not to like our chances against almost any team.

Plaxico is so damn dumb - How do you shoot yourself in the foot? I mean, even grade schoolers know not to point a gun toward your body. He must be the dumbest guy on the planet to shoot himself in the leg...wait, never mind.

The Giants are ok - It appears that the Giants might, just might, be the best team in football. Being without their top wide receiver, they again beat down a pretty good team on the road. If you know of anybody that can beat these guys, that'd be more more than I can name.

TGISports early weekend highlights

2008-11-29T10:00:00.000-08:00

ASU's defense tore up UCLA - It's amazing that even though Arizona State's defense tied an NCAA record with 4 touchdowns, this game was still somewhat of a disappointment for the Devils. The offense could only muster 2 field goals all night, and one of them was set up by a 63-yard punt return. Right now Rudy Carpenter looks like the writers for Heroes: lost, confused, and waiting for the season to be over.

Boise state goes undefeated, nobody cares - For the 2nd time in 3 years, the Broncos are undefeated. When are they going to realize the BCS doesn't give a damn about them and start losing a few games? I mean, what's the point in beating Wichita State every year if no one is going to watch? I'm not providing a link here because, even if I did, no one would click it.

ASU Bball played late for some reason - Kudos to ESPN2 for covering this game, but why did it start at 12:45 ET? Did James Harden have a 36-hour Thanksgiving or something?

Dwayne Wade is the Suns' daddy - I bet Shawn Marion (pictured above being on a crappy team) was smiling after Wade laid 43 on the Suns on Friday night. The Heat (who lost by 38 to Portland on Wednesday, mind you) looked like Oklahoma to the Suns' Texas Tech.

Charles Barkley is right - “If I was LeBron James, I would shut the hell up,” the Hall of Famer said on Patrick’s show. “I’m a big LeBron fan. He’s a stud. You gotta give him his props. I’m getting so annoyed he’s talking about what he’s going to do in two years. I think it’s disrespectful to the game. I think it’s disrespectful to the Cavaliers.” (source Yahoo.com) Nothing more to add really, if Lebron loves NYC so much, just get the hell out of Cleveland right now and don't bother waiting till 2010.

Wow, go home and stay home, Cardinals

2008-11-28T10:00:00.000-08:00

Guess who might be the worst team on the planet? Ding, ding, ding! It's the Arizona Cardinals!!! I'm writing this with 7:00 left in the 2nd quarter of the Cardinals-Eagles beatdown. I don't care if they come back and win, this team does not deserve to be in the playoffs. I am the biggest Cardinals fan you will find but I would gladly vote for an exception this year that lets another team take our division's playoff spot. Give me the petition, I'll sign it right now. I have a pen and everything and I even tested it to make sure it works.

The Cardinals better win every damn game they have left or they and their division will continue to be the laughingstock of the NFL and rightfully so. Learn to stop the run!!! Westbrook had 100 yards in the first half, he's not the f-ing Flash!

No picture because they don't deserve one.

Happy Black Friday.

The Shield is over

2008-11-26T12:00:00.000-08:00

I know this is a sports blog, but I must pay my respects to one of the best shows on TV, The Shield. It ended Tuesday night and will go down in this blogger's eyes as the best drama he's ever seen and the character of Vic Mackey as maybe the best character of all time. If you haven't seen this show yet, do yourself a big favor and watch the pilot. If that doesn't hook you, I don't know what will.

Thank goodness the Thunder suck

2008-11-26T11:00:00.000-08:00

Otherwise, the Suns would have lost by 30. I kind of feel bad for the Thunder, seeing as they beat the Suns like a drum for 40 minutes on Tuesday, yet still found a way to lose. It's amazing that the Suns even stayed in the game the way they played, especially without Shaq down the stretch. Sideshow Bob (pictured above) filled in as best he could for the big man, scoring 11 points and snagging 5 boards. Next up are the Timberwolves, a team the Suns love to lose to even though they are probably worse than ASU.

Also, I don't know what it is about Chris Wilcox, but he insists on having his best game of the season every time he plays us. It's probably because he was picked ahead of Amare, yet is nowhere near the player he is. Or because he's always played on teams like the Clippers and the Thunder, who have about as much chance of winning a title as I do. I know, I know, I'm a damn good baller, but I just don't have the hops.

TGISports weekend highlights

2008-11-24T13:00:00.000-08:00

The NFC West refuses to win! - In a show of pride, none of the teams in the NFC West broke their pact of losing this week. The Rams were the MVPs of the week, losing by an impressive 24 points to the below-average Bears. What will next week bring? Several more losses, I'm sure.

Oklahoma stops the Red Raaaaaaiders - I'm not going to lie, I watched about 8 seconds of this game. I saw it was 21-0 in the 2nd quarter and wished Texas Tech a good season, 'cause they aren't going to the National Championship, and probably not even a BCS game. Sorry, Red Raiders, you picked a horrible time to lose.

Ed Reed is my favorite player - It seems like everytime Ed Reed gets an interception, theres about a 90% chance its going for a touchdown. He got a big one on Sunday, and took it 108 goddamn yards to the house. NFL.com says my jersey of him I just ordered should arrive by Thursday, woo!

The Suns beat Portland yet again - If only the Suns could get the NBA to change their schedule to 82 games against the Trailblazers, they'd be in good shape.

Kevin Kolb is a beast! - In a move that worked out great for them, the Eagles elected to bench Donovan McNabb on Sunday, leaving the reigns to Houston University standout Kevin Kolb. What did Kolb do you ask? Oh nothing, unless you consider 10-23 for 73 yards and 2 ints nothing. You do? Oh, well then he did nothing.

Giants take down the Cardinals

2008-11-24T11:00:00.000-08:00

There's not a lot to say about this game, the better team won and that is that. The Giants showed why they are being called the best team in the league, beating a good Cardinals team at home without their number one running back or wide receiver. It will be tough for any team to go to the Meadowlands in the playoffs and beat this team in January.

Now that I'm done being diplomatic, its time to rip Matt Ware, Ralph Brown and the entire kickoff coverage team. How many times can you give up 50+ yard returns or negate your own return with an offside penalty or an illegal block in the back? The Giants started five, count 'em five, drives in Cardinals territory. And with the efficient and solid offense the Giants have, that is enough to lose you the game. Also, when did Ralph Brown have his hands surgically-replaced with frying pans? Or maybe that ball just hit him in a weird spot, like in his hands or chest. C'mon man, those gloves you wear are basically mittens with glue all over them, you should be able to catch a ball with your eyes closed.

Suns take a beating

2008-11-21T12:00:00.000-08:00

What a shock, the Suns lost to another quality opponent. The Lakers blew them out in the 2nd half when the Suns had answers for exactly zero of their players. And how did I know that Vladimir "I'm a douche" Radmonovic would break out of his slump against the Suns, to the tune of knocking down 4 straight 3-pointers (all of which killed the Suns). If the Suns want to be taken seriously this year they have to actually beat someone, and not just pound the East like they have the past few years.

Are you kidding me? Energy Solutions Arena?

2008-11-19T12:00:00.000-08:00

I know I'm a day late on getting to the Suns-Jazz debacle from Monday, but I must talk about the Jazz's arena's name. Its Energy Solutions Arena for God's sake. I understand naming sporting venues after companies, but if your company has the most generic name ever, maybe stick to commercials. I have an idea for a stadium name, how about "Going to Dinner Stadium" or "I just sat down Arena".

TGISports Weekend Highlights

2008-11-17T14:30:00.000-08:00

Arizona State has a winning streak! - Actually, are you allowed to call it a winning streak if the two teams you beat have a combined 1 win? Yes? I refuse to believe that, I prefer to call it a non-losing streak. Or a nonlostreak.

U of A loses, I LOL - After getting a worse pounding than General Motors in the first half, U of A closed a 45-17 gap to 48-45, the Wildcats faded and are now firmly slotted in the 4th or lower spot in the Pac-10. Maybe next year they'll manage to actually get into a decent bowl. Hahahaha, just joking, they'll always stink.

Nothing happened in college football - Did any team that was favored lose? No? Okay then, next story.

The Eagles totally kissed their sister - Look, if you're going to tie a team, at least make a good team. Tieing with Cinicinnati is the equivalent to losing to most teams, if not all of them. Lets hope for a repeat performance against the Cardinals in a couple weeks.

Cardinals sneak away from Seattle with a win

2008-11-17T12:00:00.000-08:00

In what was yet another heart-attack-inducing game, the Cardinals left Seattle with a 26-20 win and a magic number of 2 to win the division. Looking at the stats you'd think the Cardinals won by a wide margin, but of course they didn't, they kept it close and tried their best to give it up. The Seahawks' offense was horrible, yet still scored 3 touchdowns (all on drives of less than 20 yards). It was yet another example of how the Cardinals have a lot of learning to do when it comes to closing out games, as they let Seattle and their ugly fans turn a 26-7 blowout into a close game.

That being said, it was really hard to find things to complain about after the Cardinals went into a hostile road environment and came away with an impressive victory. Kurt Warner had another ridiculous game, throwing for over 250 yards in the first half alone. Boldin and Fitzgerald each had over 150 yards receiving, and the Seahawks had no more success covering them that I would. The secondary played decent (especially my new favorite player Dominic Rodgers-Cromartie, or "DRC" as cool people like me call him) and the linebackers did a great job of stuffing the run.

This win sets up a great matchup next week in Glendale against the Giants who had yet another very impressive win on Sunday, piling up over 200 yards on the Ravens. It would be an amazing win for the Cardinals, who I actually give a shot to only because they are at home. If this game was in the Meadowlands, I'd look for a schellacking similar to the Jets game.

Suns put the boots to Detroit

2008-11-17T10:00:00.000-08:00

The Suns had their most impressive victory of the young season on Sunday, beating the Detroit Pistons 104-86 in downtown Phoenix. The Suns played their most complete game of the season as well, outplaying Detroit on offense and defense. Even the bench got in on the action, with players like Boris Diaw, Louis Amundson and even Sean Singletary (no, not the 49er's head coach) getting in on the action. I'm not sure what it was that propelled the Suns to such a great game; maybe it was Terry Porter's desire to beat the team that scorned him in the off-season, maybe it was Grant Hill's desire to beat his former team for the first time, or maybe it was just Shaq's (pictured above right before he ate Ken Mauer) desire to beat the crap out of Kwame Brown and Rasheed Wallace (which he did until he was ejected for nearly decapitating Rodney Stuckey). Let's hope the Suns can keep up the stellar play as they enter a very difficult week in which they face Utah, the Lakers and Portland.

Cardinals enter crucial stretch

2008-11-13T10:00:00.000-08:00

After pulling out the win on Monday night, the Cardinals now have a very important stretch of 3 games coming up. They go to Seattle, at home against the Giants and at Philly on Thanksgiving. The Cards could lose all 3 very easily and be right back at .500. Although they still may win the division if this happens, they sure as heck will not be in a good position come playoff time.

It may be unlikely, but the Cardinals have a shot at getting a first round bye after moving to 6-3. Only the Giants and Panthers have better records than them so it is conceivable they could move ahead of one of them and have a week off come playoff time. At the very least the Cardinals will host a playoff game if they win the division (which hasn't happened since like 1904 or something). If the Cards can win at least one of these games they will be in good shape for the rest of their schedule, which includes home games against the Rams, Vikings and Seahawks.

No sports were played on Tuesday

2008-11-12T10:00:00.000-08:00

Apparently Tuesday was "Let's give everyone the day off work and then have no sports on TV" day and I wasn't informed. No Suns, No NBA, No NFL, not even any decent College football. And yes I did see Ball State playing, but it's Ball State, nobody actually gives a damn about them. The only people that watched that game were either alumni of the school or 12 year-olds who LOL when they hear the world "ball".

By the way, the above photo is what came up when I typed in "Sad sports" in Google image search. I think it fits well.

Suns escape Grizzlies, move to 6-2

2008-11-11T13:00:00.000-08:00

The Suns followed up their 3-1 road trip with a 107-102 victory over the Memphis Grizzlies on Monday. OJ Mayo had a great game, scoring 33 points (before his big birthday bash over at Suede or Mist or one of those one-word clubs in Scottsdale). The Suns did struggle with the Grizzlies, but showed that they are still a great team by winning on a night they probably shouldn't have. Leandro Barbosa scored 27 points of the bench and basically saved the Suns in the 4th quarter, who couldn't hold on to the ball to save their life. Even Boris Diaw, who's usually very sure-handed had a couple turnovers. Maybe if he pretended the ball was a stupid haircut he would have fought harder to keep it.

Lincecum gets the Cy Young

2008-11-11T11:06:00.001-08:00

It was announced today that Tim Lincecum won the NL Cy Young award today, getting 23 of 32 first place votes. He beat out 2006 Cy Young winner Brandon Webb, probably because of the way Webb faded in August and part of September, while Lincecum was dominating people. Oh well, the D'backs just got one more reason to feel bad about themselves after the awful collapse they had in the '08 season.

The Cardinals BARELY won

2008-11-11T09:00:00.000-08:00

Thank the good lord that the Cardinals came away with the victory on Monday night, beating the 49ers 29-24 in one of the best games of the season. If the Cardinals didn't win I would really have no point in living, if only for the reason that I'd have to see Mike Singletary's ugly face for about 8 straight hours on ESPN. Did anyone else notice how he apparently transformed into a supermodel, because the damn camera loved him on Monday. When the Niners got the ball to the 2 yard line with 50 seconds left I was dreading seeing his face if they got a touchdown to go ahead. I knew that image would be burned into my retina for the rest of my life and ESPN would be thanking their lucky stars they get to show his press conference (which I'm sure would have gone on for like 12 hours). Next up: next Sunday at Seattle. A game the Cardinals should win, but probably won't.

P.S. I just thought of the headline ESPN.com would have had if they 49ers won. Five bucks it would have been "Singletary Vision". Ten bucks says my lunch would have been on my keyboard after that as well.

TGISports Weekend Highlights

2008-11-10T10:26:00.001-08:00

Adrian Peterson wore a condom - I'm not sure if he ran out of du-rags or just wanted to stretch this one out for later, but he might want to reconsider his choice of head wear. Although I'd wear that too if it would help me rush for 192 yards.

The NFC West is still really bad - The Seahawks and Rams lost AGAIN on Sunday, dropping them both to 2-7 on the season. A Cardinals win against the 49ers could very well seal this division, but I'm sure it won't and the Cardinals will find some way to lose some games and make it interesting (i.e. at Seattle, home vs. the Giants and at Philly).

ASU lost agai....wait no they didn't! - In a shocking move, the Arizona State Sun Devils managed to pull off a victory against the vaunted Washington Huskies. The Huskie, despite their 0-9 record and them being the worst team to ever step on a football field, held the lead for much of the game against the Devils. Next up: powerhouse Washington State (1-9).

The Lakers are 5-0 - Who is going to beat these guys? If they don't go 70-12 this season is a disappointment in my eyes.

Steelers beat Redskins, Obama is gonna win

2008-11-04T11:00:00.000-08:00

The Steelers physically dominated the Redskins on Monday, beating them 23-6. But that isn't the real story; if tradition stays true (and it has 17 straight times), than the Redskins loss before election day means the party not holding the presidency will win the upcoming election. If you do the math, that means the People's Champion Barack Obama is about to become our 43rd president. It's a pretty interesting stat, almost as interesting as the stat that says every time the Lions lose, the next day in the week will be Monday. Take THAT, Lions fans.

Actually, I apologize for that last joke, it was terrible.

Cardinals crush Rams 34-13

2008-11-03T12:00:00.000-08:00

The Cardinals got a rare road win on Sunday, defeating the Rams in St. Louis. It was a great win for the Cards, who scored 24 points in the second quarter and basically stepped on the Rams' throats in the final few minutes of the half.

It was an important win for Arizona, but I couldn't help but think how many un-Cardinals-like plays that happened throughout the game. Normally they are the ones with all calls going against them and all the karma being on the other team's sideline. Some of the aforementioned plays were:

1. Jerheme "I spell my name with an H for no reason" Urban's 56 yard touchdown pass that should have been an interception (normally that would be picked off and taken to the house by the other team)
2. Tim Hightower's 100 yard game (when is the last time THAT happened?)
3. Antrel Rolle's (pictured above) interception for a touchdown (normally its our QB who throws a duck to the other team)
4. The fact that the referees called two plays wrong, both in the Cardinals favor (although both were challenged and overturned. It's still a minor win.)

Next up is San Francisco on Monday freakin' night. The Cards lucked out getting a game in the national spotlight, let's hope they don't let the Niners off the hook, like they did the last time they played someone on a Monday.

TGISports weekend highlights

2008-11-03T11:00:00.000-08:00

Lubbock, TX FTW - Everyone's darling the Texas Longhorns lost on Saturday to Texas Tech or Texas A&M or Texas Christian or one of those other Texas teams. Now it looks like we are on pace to get Alabama against Penn St in the National Championship game. I can hardly contain myself. I think I'd rather have a root canal than watched that 6-3 wretch of a game.

The Suns are 2-1 - The Suns looked good on Saturday night when they beat the Portland Trailblazers for the 10th straight time. Boris Diaw had a decent game, scoring nine points (and grabbed Martell Webster's junk as well, pictured above). It's amazing how some teams just have other teams number, kind of like how every team in California has ASU's number. Speaking of ASU...

Another loss, what a shock- After losing 27-25 to Oregon State on Saturday, the Sun Devils are now 2-6 and must win every game from here on out (Wash, Wash St, UCLA, Arizona) to even be bowl eligible. The team is so bad at this point it doesn't even matter if they somehow make it to a bowl they'll just get blown out by Tennessee State or Louisiana Tech.

The Seahawks are so bad - After losing 26-7 to the Eagles on Sunday, the Seahawks may be the worst team in the NFL. It's down to the Lions and them right now, and the Lions actually put up a fight on the road against the Bears, so they may have inched ahead of the 'Hawks.

Suns lose home opener

2008-10-31T08:24:00.001-07:00

During the second part of their back-to-back to open the season, the Phoenix Suns lost 108-95 to the New Orleans Hornets on Thursday night. This comes as really no surprise to this fan, as the Suns have not beaten the Hornets since Chris Paul (pictured above after smelling Raja's Bells rampant BO) donned that turquoise jersey. The Suns' bench (yes, they have a bench now!) did make a run in the 4th quarter, closing the lead to 83-80, but the Hornets then unleashed a flurry of 3 pointers, pushing the lead to 12 and never looking back. It was great to see coach Terry Porter have some faith in his bench (even if it means falling behind by a few points) and not immediately react by bringing back his starters (coughD'antonicough).

Rays fans are unlucky

2008-10-30T14:49:00.000-07:00

How unlucky do you have to be to get hit in the dome with a vodka bottle? I mean, all you want to do is climb around on a traffic light and some jerk bounces a Smirnoff bottle off your dome? How fair is that? It'd be like if I was robbing a bank and they tried to arrest me or something. I mean, Who do those "police" think they are?

Thanks to Yankeez for the video.

Suns start season off with a win

2008-10-30T12:00:00.000-07:00

It appears that Terry Porter is already had a positive effect on the Suns, what with them beating the Spurs 103-98 on Wednesday night. He already has one more win against a good team than D'antoni did last year (I think his record against Western playoff teams was like 0-138). The real story from this game is Greg Popovich and his ridiculous Hack-a-Shaq'ing. At least O'neal was 5 for 8 from the line during the game, possibly giving Popovich something to think about in the future. I will give him credit though, the foul five seconds into the game was pretty funny. Almost as funny as Pop's awful beard he thinks he can pull off. You have to be a real man to pull that look off, like Leonidis from 300, or me.

P.S. It took me HOURS to find a picture of Tim Duncan complaining, they are more rare than a damn unicorn.

Phillies win world series

2008-10-30T10:00:00.000-07:00

Thank the good lord I am able to stop talking about baseball for four months. Yay, the Phillies won, their pour city hasn't had a championship in 20 years. Cry me a river. At least now you are free to keep cheering when hall of famers end their career and booing anyone and everyone who doesn't perform every single night of their life.

Guess which sport is awful?

2008-10-29T10:00:00.000-07:00

I turned on the Lakers-Blazers game last night and within the first 30 SECONDS I see Derek Fisher (pictured above being a douchebag) flying across the court like he was just shot out of a cannon, and Blazers center Gred Oden was called for a foul. This is the antithesis of why the NBA is now my 3rd favorite sport and could fall behind MMA very quickly. There are so many ridiculous, cheap tactics that some players use to get an advantage, and the referees are still falling for them. Speaking of the referees, they're awful. They only give calls to teams who complain or are supposed to win (see the Spurs and Lakers). Yes, I am a bitter Suns fan who is very biased because of their inability to win a championship. But this is getting re-goddamn-diculous and I'll be damned if I watch a single game outside the Suns games this year.

Oh my gawd, Eli sabotaged the Giants!

2008-10-28T12:46:00.001-07:00

In news that is spreading like wildfire, Eli Manning supposedly sabotaged his own team this past Sunday night against the Steelers. Apparently Manning mouthed the name of the play to the sidelines before a crucial 4th and goal and someone on the Steelers' defense read his lips and knew the play. Why this is such big news is beyond me. I saw it on ESPN.com last night and thought it was interesting, but today (two days late, mind you) it is the cover story on Yahoo.com. Apparently their isn't enough real news out there to cover so they have to rely on sports stories like this. If they wanted sports news, how about how the freaking World Series may never end, or how about that real news story we call the election. Yah, that's only a week away, maybe run some filler on that instead.

TGISports weekend highlights

2008-10-27T12:00:00.000-07:00

The NFC West is still awful - If the Seahawks and 49ers hadn't played each other, every team in the NFC West would have lost again this past Sunday. When I saw Seattle/San Francisco on the schedule I assumed it would end a tie or somehow both teams would lose. In case anyone thought this division was on the rise after the Rams won 2 straight and the Cardinals were 4-2, simply look to Sunday's scoreboard.

The Phillies are up 3-1 - Apparently the theme of this post season will go down as "Underdogs FTW". Has one favorite actually won a series? Maybe the Red Sox, but they promptly folded, just like Patrick Cote's knee (sorry!)

ESPN loves horse racing - How many times must I hear about the stupid Breeder's Cup? It's not one of the big three races and Big Brown isn't in it, so why are you still covering it? I'm sure there is another meaningless Big 10 game you'd love to air instead.

Penn St. beat Ohio St. - Because I despise Ohio St. more than pretty much any other institution in America (Europe is a whole other ball of wax), it was great to see Penn St. and Joe Pa take down the Buckeyes. I just feel sorry for anyone in attendance for that horribly boring game. 3-3 at halftime? C'mon.

Cardinals lose, drop to 4-3

2008-10-27T09:00:00.000-07:00

Even with the refs help, the Panthers were only able to win 27-23 against the road-weary Cardinals. Coupled with the 49ers loss in New England, West Coast teams are now 0-11 playing games on the East Coast.

As far as the game went, the Cardinals played a great first half and a great first possession in the second half, but it went downhill and downhill fast after that. After going down 17-3, the Panthers scored about two minutes later and then again about 30 seconds after that (thanks to Warner's lone interception). It was in classic Cardinals fashion as they snatched defeat from the jaws of victory and couldn't stop the Panthers on their final possession, culminating by allowing Carolina to convert a 3rd and 11 with a freaking draw play. Next up is the Rams in St. Louis, a road game the Cardinals are actually capable of winning. Whether they do it remains to be seen, but as Lloyd Christmas said "So, you're telling me there's a chance."